Relationship. Yes, all of us are in it. Friends or family. It’s life’s cycle. When we were young, we thought that life was gonna be beautiful cause at that time, we were only concerned with playing and enjoying ourselves without much care in the world. As we grew up, the challenges grew bigger and the hits grew harder. All sorts of problems arose one by one out of nowhere. Family problems, relationship problems and love problems are the most common. I scoured the web and found 9 interesting questions that is worth looking into. Below each question is my opinion. Your comments are most welcomed. =)
- My friend is suicidal. How I be of help?
According to the National Mental Health Association, more than 19 million Americans suffer from depression each year. Among teens, one out of five is depressed. Suicide comes into a person’s mind when life reaches a climax of unbearable pain. These are the times your friend doesn’t think he can ever get through, but when he does, he won’t know how he got through it. Here are several ways to deal with it.
- Try talking to your friend. If you think that the source of depression comes from the family, don’t speak with them. If not, talk to his parents. Let them know about your concern and the seriousness of the situation. Talk to a professional about it. Ending a person’s life is something that cannot be replaced. Once gone, it’s gone forever.
- Be a true friend and keep his mind occupied. Pick up a hobby together that uses up a lot of strength and power. Maybe he’s a pain glutton. Try body building. It will keep his body in shape and healthy, plus release all the rage inside.
- Start buying him lots and lots of dark chocolate. Why? Cause it keeps a person happy. Really. Dark chocolate has this thing called ‘phenylethylamine’ which enhances your mood.
- Do something crazy with him. Go for a haircut. Something different for a change. Dye it, highlight it, shave it. Whatever. Feel new. Feel different. Feel good.
- Take a look at this website.
- Look for common ground. Music, class, office politics or even mutual friends will help.
- Timing is very important. Don’t ask during breaks. Ask in private. When I was in school, I waited till after class to ask. My chance came when both our parents came late to pick us up. *jeng* *jeng* *jeng*… when opportunity came knocking on my door, I took it. =P
- Maybe there’s no chance that you and your crush could be alone for even a moment. Or maybe you’re too shy. Then, this is where other methods of communication come in. You can choose to email her, sms her, write a note and leave it on her desk.
- Ask your friends for help. Invite him/her out to fun and interesting activities like movies or dinners with mutual friends so that both of you have a comfortable environment to start in.
It’s good to know that your best friend ignored you. It shows that you are only ‘used’ when she is lonely. But if you still think of all the years and good times that you’ve went through together and it makes you sad to see the friendship end, confront her. Tell her how you feel. Tell her about the disappointment you feel. Tell her (if you and her are best friends I believe you will be crying when you say this) that ‘these tears are the last tears’ that you will ever cry for her. Warn her to not come and cry to you if/when she breaks up with her boyfriend.
Yeah. That should sound better. Remember, do not risk yourself by asking questions. Just say how you feel and how you will treat her from that day onwards. The day will come when she grows up, but until then, carry on with your life.
Simple. It’s cheating if you say yes to these 4 :
- you have to hide it or lie about it.
- it’ll lower your partner’s self-esteem.
- you feel guilty about it.
- you wouldn’t want your partner to do it.
- Write out your feelings in a journal and let her read them when she’s calm. Blogging helps.
- Maybe your mom doesn’t mean to have a bad temper. Maybe your mom is probably frustrated with her work or family situation. Maybe her anger is towards things you do or you don’t do. Maybe she a lot of things to do in very little time. Maybe you can contribute in getting some things done for her.
- Try movies, lunch, dinner, concerts, park rides or just give her a surprise b’day party. Try to reacquaint by doing things together.
From a child’s perspective, some parents
- act like they know everything
- always boss you around
- are picky
- extra overprotective
- embarrass them in front of their friends.
I believe that children are the products of their parents whose message to their children is ‘do as I do’, and until some children breaks the cycle, only then will morality and bondage come back.
Ask yourself. Do they yell or overreact? Do you feel like you’re not being heard? Do they treat you like a child instead of a person who is becoming an adult? It would be helpful if you can let them know the reasons why you get upset.
Try talking to one parent at a time. A letter would also be a good idea. And try not to jump to conclusions. Most parents want to help their children with difficult problems. If you expect a parent to respond with a lecture and not really hear you out, you might actually get what you expect. Although it may be a little scary to think about, it is often true that the way we approach a situation has a lot to do with what happens. For example, if we approach a situation with negative expectations, we may do things to make a negative outcome more likely. On the other hand, if you can try to be open and honest, then your parents might also respond openly and honestly.
lol. Talk to him. Tell him about how you feel. That’s it. If he’s still being childish about it. Then maybe you should reevaluate your relationship. A relationship without respect is like Wan Ton Soup without Won Ton. A couple who stops thinking and acting alike will lose attraction to each other. Once a person changes his character and outlook, the relationship will change too.
Damn. This is tough. Locks were invented for a reason, right? One thing is for sure. Parents will either react hard or easy. Believe me, both parties will surely be embarrassed. Sometimes it will result in anger, sometimes it will result in a mutual understanding.
If they don’t say anything, let it be. If they do behave or act funny, approach them for a time where you and your parents can talk about it. Be honest and open for comments. Remember that other people’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality. Let them finish talking before you say anything. Show some respect. When it’s your turn to talk, expect the same.
One more thing, please remember to lock the room. =)
Time heals all wounds. Not your friends, family, comedies or counseling but time.
- Eat a bar of Hershey’s daily. It should keep you happy. Don’t over eat, ya.
- Take up a sport. Let go of all the frustration on the cycling machine, treadmill and dumbbells.
- The universal rule of karma. What goes around, comes around.
Once you’ve healed. Get a life. Socialize. Make as many friends as you can and stick to the ones that are true and honest. Make sure you have a life of your own before hopping on another relationship. See what you wanna achieve in life and go for it. Know that nothing in this world last forever. You should live your life for no one else in this world, but yourself.